Shannon VanRaes

We are very, very flexible.

And while we feel like there’s a special kind of bond that develops between surrogates and intended parents, we also understand that medical appointments can be awkward, and surrogates don’t always want intended parents in the room, or even the building, which, having been down this road, we totally get.

So we’d really want to let the surrogate lead the way on how involved they wanted us to be on a day-to-day basis—if they wanted us to babysit or pick up groceries for them or text updates, we’d be there in a heartbeat. Having a surrogate relationship based on friendship would be fantastic, but then again, if you wanted to just get on with it, we’d make the space for you to do that too.

If successful, we’d spend the rest of our lives telling the kid about the remarkable act of kindness that led to their birth, and ideally, we'd love the kid to know who that woman was. However, if you wanted to remain anonymous, we would of course respect that wish.